HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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