Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Randomize
