Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize