Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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