is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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