u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize
