so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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