I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
