I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
