Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
