I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Randomize
