I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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