and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
