rhymes with "ouble enetration"
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Randomize