I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
