So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize