oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
