dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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