I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
I smell stomach acid.
you traded sex for a burrito?
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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