I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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