So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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