what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
This show inspires me to have sex in space
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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