thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
