I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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