You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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