I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
