Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
