I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
