Non-Jews are for practice
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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