He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
