i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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