I feel like abortions should bother me more
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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