I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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