I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize