if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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