when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize
