I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
