kristin has been a bad kristin
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
