you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Randomize
