but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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