Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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