Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Randomize
