therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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