whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
