We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
