one two three fourrrrnication!
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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