Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize