super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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