you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
