apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
