How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
