Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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