Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
